July 15, 1990 – Sunday

The days ran together and my worries built up on top of each other. My stress headaches were worse, yet with all the pain I felt in so many ways, Eli’s pain must be so much worse; more than I could even begin to imagine. Eli’s HGB was 7.1 this morning so a blood transfusion would occur soon. Henry would not leave me alone most of the day and nurses had to intervene at times. This was not good for Eli. I both hated and pitied Henry in a way.

In the late afternoon, Ella and Riley phoned into Eli’s room. I knew they taped the entire conversation, they always did and it never ended.  They tried to upset me, but their plan backfired. Towards the end of the conversation, I found out that Henry, Noah, and Gavin had gone back to Durango.  This meant Noah was at Bow Mar, and fear rippled through my whole being.

I fell into a restless sleep tonight with Eli at my side. He and I just simply gave each other comfort; my little boy living a hell, of a life extended comfort to his mom while she, with feet dangling also toward the pits of hell, tried so much to share with her son a taste of Heaven on Earth.  If only it were simple.

Damn Cancer!!!!